Allyson Hobbs is a Stanford professor. And her parents are divorcing. And at 80. After 60 years.
What’s more; her childhood home is to be sold. And the marriage had survived the death of a child. That is, Hobb’s sister, Sharon. And this happened in 1998.
Hobbs describes how her parents had the same tales of their childhood in the South Side of Chicago. And how they shared the same jokes. Hobbs expresses feelings of overwhelm.
And this is because of the failure of her parent’s marriage. According to Hobbs:
‘I am undone, untethered, dysfunctional. …in a small boat, too fatigued to pick up an oar, lost at sea. The lighthouse that never failed to guide me home is now out of service.’
Hobbs didn’t want separate holidays. So she planned a ‘family Christmas’ holiday party. And she did all the festive things she had seen her mother do.
Such as garland hanging, and placing bows on doorways.
And she decorated the house with outdoor lighting and hired a musician to assist with caroling.
So Hobbs, in her article, captures the difficulties of ‘mourning a family and people who are still alive’
And according to Hobbs:
‘I think of my friends whose parents divorced when they were children or teenagers. I am an adult. [And I] don’t have to shuttle between two homes, I won’t have to endure remarriages, I don’t believe that I am at fault. …should be able to stanch the wound, but I can’t. I’m bleeding out.’
How are assets divided in a California divorce?
So in a California divorce, assets and debts accumulated in a marriage belong, equally, to both spouses
And there are three steps;
- Find out whether the property/debt is separate/marital
- Decide marital property value
- Agree on how property is to be divided
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